Happy Holidays

Ahhh, the holidays. A time of year for peace on earth, no school, and sleeping in until 12. Then you wake up to pumpkin pie burning in the oven, siblings fighting each other, and some important appliance in the house will break, usually something that involves keeping the house warm. This year it was my backdoor.

The word "holiday" is sometimes synonymous with the word "stress." Parties, presents, cards, relatives, and dinners all combine to develop a cacophony of conflicting demands that create stress. For some reason, 85% of all Christmas parties that you are obligated to go to are scheduled on the same day. At or around the same time. I had two this weekend, and had to turn down another one. Oddly enough, people can't seem to understand that their party isn't the most important thing in the world that I have to attend to. So, basically, I am a despicable human being for blowing off the very essence of Christmas itself by not attending. (I may be a little bitter)

Holiday parties are unique. No one has a good time, there is never any good food, the timing is always the most inconvenient, there is never any place to park, and yet, 90% of the people in attendance will leave commenting on how great the evening was. I think there's something in the eggnog. Honestly, I don't see the point. And don't even get me started on white elephant gift exchanges. I mean, nothing says "Merry Christmas" like a useless gift under $5.

Then there's the presents. One of the most important aspects of Christmas that causes the most anxiety. To quote the ever insightful Sheldon Cooper, "I know you think you are being generous, but the foundation of gift giving is reciprocity. You haven't given me a gift. You've given me an obligation... The essence of the custom is that I now have to go out and purchase for you a gift of commensurate value and representing the same perceived level of friendship as that represented by the gift you've given me. It's no wonder suicide rates skyrocket this time of year." That pretty much sums it up.

Then there's the surprise gift, when a peripheral acquaintance has a sudden burst of generosity and remembers you're on the planet long enough to buy you an insignificant trinket. Along with the feeling of surprise comes guilt, because you forget they were on the planet, and the need to respond in kind. Normally, the proper way out of this situation is "oh, I have yours at home and I can't believe I forgot it." My personal advice? Don't bother. This person probably wanted to get rid of a white elephant gift from an earlier party and you were the first sucker that came to mind. Don't take on the added stress of buying yet another gift for yet another person who probably couldn't care less.

Sadly, the holidays prove to be a stressful time of year. So take time out of the hectic hustle and bustle to take a sip of eggnog, walk through a winter wonderland (even if it's just typing "let it snow" into google), and rediscover the joys of Christmas. Being a college student means you're not expected to always act like an adult; take advantage of this. Chill out, goof off, get in a snowball fight at two in the morning. And hope Santa brings a full tuition scholarship for your stocking.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.